Let me go back 3 years ago to August 2008. Papa Chuy, Nana, my older sister Belissa, and my cousin Cami went on vacation to Miami for a few days. I wanted to join them so badly, especially since my 1st anniversary was days away and that's where Jonathan and I took our honeymoon, but since I was pregnant they were afraid to take me along. While they were on their vacation my little sister who was pregnant with my nephew, Mikey, found out she was going to be induced. She was induced late in the evening of August 5, which was also Nana & Papa Chuy's 52nd anniversary, while the vacationers made their way home. Jonathan & I had also come in to town for Mikey's arrival earlier that afternoon. Andie's labor progressed through the morning of Wednesday, August 6th while my grandparents, sister, & cousin drove in from Van Horn. Mikey was born at 2:14 pm. We were all so excited for his arrival and we were glad that we were all able to be there together to celebrate as a family. We spent the afternoon hearing all about the trip to Miami, laughing together, and taking turns checking out the new baby. Life was good and we were happy to experience the blessing of a new life. I remember sitting outside of the nursery windows watching the nurses give Mikey his bath and talking with Nana and Papa Chuy about my little one on the way. They were so overwhelmed by the idea that they would get to have 2 great-grandchildren within a few months of each other. Papa Chuy is probably the proudest grandpa I've ever seen. He would talk to anyone and everyone about his 4 granddaughters and he was so excited to have new little ones on the way to brag about.
Later that evening Nana, Papa Chuy, and Cami got ready to leave town and I told them the next time I'd see them was when I was in the hospital to give birth to Kate. Little did I know that I'd be back in that very hospital in a matter of hours for what turned out to be the absolute worst night of my life.
Around 10:30 pm we got a call from my uncle that there was an accident in Pecos, halfway between Odessa & El Paso, and that Papa Chuy was being airlifted back to Odessa. Nana had minor injuries and was taken to the Pecos hospital and Cami was ok. It turns out that they were exiting Pecos to get some dinner and when they were at a stop sign & starting to go straight a semi truck came over the overpass with its lights off and hit the drivers side straight on. In the past I was never even able to think about the idea of Papa Chuy passing away. I knew that it was irrational to think he would live forever but I just couldn't imagine life without him so I would just never think about it. The possibility of that moment was clearly upon me as we waited in the Emergency Room for the helicopter to bring him in. I was freaking out. I was only 26 weeks along in my pregnancy so I knew I had to take care of myself but my emotions were out of control. I remember looking at Jonathan and asking him if this was it and him just squeezing my hand and saying, "I don't know Kim. Its gonna be ok though." Jonathan was my rock that night. The time between knowing he was in the hospital and when we were able to talk to a doctor seemed like eternity. When we finally did get to talk to a doctor my world stopped. He told us that Papa Chuy's head was filling with blood and his brain injuries were too far gone. He was unconcious but everything else on his body was functioning fine. He told us we had anywhere from a few hours to a few days til he was gone. My worst fear was upon me, the thing I never wanted to think about was there and nothing could stop it. I was crying out of control. I couldn't sit up. I started getting really strong contractions because my emotions were so out of control. After a little while a team of nurses came in the little waiting room we were put in and they tried to calm me down. They warned me that I could cause myself to go into early labor if I didn't calm down; since I was only 26 weeks that would be highly dangerous for the viability of the baby.
I remember going to see Papa Chuy for the first time. He looked completely normal; there were no cuts, bruises, or anything on him. Everything looked just like normal except mentally he was gone. Our chance to say goodbye was gone. We would never hear his voice again, never hear him laugh or tell a joke, never get another hug. I so badly wanted to just wake him up and make all of this go away but I couldn't. I wanted to crawl up in his lap like I did all the time even up to that very afternoon but I couldn't. My Papa Chuy was gone even though his body was still there.
Within a few hours he was moved into ICU. I stayed there all night because I just didn't want to leave him. We really thought he wouldn't make it through the night and I wanted to be there when he passed. He made it through the night and I finally went back to my mom's around 6 am to get some rest. By 8 am or so word about the accident was spreading and the phones were ringing nonstop. I had to stop being the one to answer the phones and tell the story because my pregnancy hormones were going crazy again. People kept saying that it was possible for him to come out of it if we just had faith but I knew that all the faith in the world really couldn't do anything to save him. I don't mean to sound like I don't believe in the big miracles that God can perform but I just know that in this case it was just too far gone. If it were up to my plan I would give Papa Chuy the miraculous healing but it wasn't up to me, God had other plans and I had to accept that.
Later that day we started to get visitors from all over coming to see Papa Chuy. Most of his brothers and sisters made it in to be able to see him and a lot of friends came in from Van Horn and El Paso as well. We were obviously heartbroken by the situation but it was so inspiring to see how many people loved and cared for my Papa Chuy. I know that it was a testament to how he lived his life that so many people came to pay their respects before he passed. Thursday and Friday was spent at the hospital taking in visitors, sitting in the room with Papa Chuy, and hearing reports from the doctors. For a while it looked like the rest of his body was hanging on and doing well except his brain was still fading. Friday night Jonathan and I went home to Plainview to get more clothes and get ready to stay either in Odessa until he passed or in Van Horn for some time around the funeral.
I can still picture my last moment with Papa Chuy in his room. I remember just holding his hand and not wanting to let go. I always loved his hands for some reason. They were small but strong, they were rough which showed me he was a hard worker, but they were clean, they usually smelled like something he was eating or cooking at the restaurant, they were chubby little hands but they were perfect. His hands were always warm and in that moment they were still warm but were getting colder. Ever since I had gotten pregnant I had pictured him holding my little baby but since that wasn't going to happen I just put his hand on my belly and told him to be sure to look down on us on the day Kate was going to be born. His breathing was loud through his breathing tube and I remembered all the times I stayed at his house and giggled with my sisters about how loud he snored in the room next to us. Once it was time to go I kissed him on the cheek like I did every time I saw him. He always made sure I gave him a good kiss on the cheek; if I didn't do it good enough he'd grumble and tell me to try again. I walked out of his little room knowing that would be the last time I'd ever see him alive. It took everything I had to walk out of that room and walk out with strength.
Saturday, August 9 I just knew something was going to happen. I could hardly get myself going. I was packing to leave and I remember sobbing in my closet because I had nothing to wear to a funeral- especially with my pregnant belly. I had never had to dress for a family funeral before. I was angry that I had to go to a funeral. I didn't want to think about going to my grandparents house and Papa Chuy not being there. Every night when he got home from the restaurant I would take off his shoes and put on his house shoes. I wanted to be able to do that again but knew I couldn't. I have those house shoes sitting on a shelf in my house today. I finally got myself together and got ready to leave. There was something that happened to me that day that I guess I'll never really know if it was coincidental or something more spiritual but it is my most vivid memory of that day. While I was sitting down putting my make-up on I was all of a sudden overcome with this strange feeling like the wind was sucked out of me; I had a hard time breathing, I was really nauseous, dizzy, & just feeling strange. After a few minutes the feeling passed and I was back to normal. That happened around 11 am. Once we were on the road back to Odessa, around 3:00, we were sitting in the car and the same thing happened again. Every sensation that happened earlier happened again in the same way. About 30 minutes later my mom called and told us that Papa Chuy passed away. She said they turned off the machines around 11 and he died around 3. I don't know if we really were tied in some way spiritually or if it was coincidence but on Saturday, August 9, 2008, a part of my heart died along with the most influential man in my life.
The days that followed were very emotional. Jonathan and I had our first anniversary two days later; it definitely wasn't what we expected it would be on the day we got married but in a way it was perfect. Jonathan was amazing throughout the whole process. He loved Papa Chuy so much and admired him almost as much as I did. Jonathan's wedding band is Papa Chuy's original wedding band. I told him when we were dating that I always wanted to find a man that was like my Papa Chuy and he would have big shoes to fill. I think that became more real to him as he really saw how much he meant to me. I do believe that in many ways Jonathan is like Papa Chuy and it makes me love him so much more. That also makes me believe we are perfect together because I'm a lot like my Nana.
As we prepared for his funeral I was, again, overwhelmed by the outpouring of love from people all over whose lives had been touched by Papa Chuy. His restaurant had been open for almost 50 years at that point so the people who have known him from there alone was in the hundreds if not thousands. He and Nana have always been active in the community of Van Horn so there was people from years back up to the present who respected him. Following the funeral we got so many cards with people giving accounts of how Papa Chuy touched their lives and how much they admired him. His buddy, John Madden, even called to give his condolences to Nana. We had to have his funeral in the high school auditorium because the churches in town were too small to hold the number of people who wanted to attend his services. The flower arragements people sent were amazing. The stage was full of plants & flowers and blue & silver ribbons were tied on just about all of them because everyone knew how much of a Dallas Cowboys fan he was. I was incredibly torn up during the service but deep down I knew that it was ok because someday I will be reunited with Papa Chuy again.
Life hasn't been the same since Papa Chuy has been gone. Nana literally lost her other half. They had been married for 52 years and had run the restaurant together for almost 50 years. Their everyday life involved each other all day long. Nana told me her side of the story of the accident while we stayed with her after the funeral. She said that when the truck hit them Papa Chuy's glasses were hit off of his face so he couldn't really see. He was fumbling around for them and calling out for Nana. She said he kept saying her name and asking if she was ok. She told him she was fine and to rest and that help was on its way. After she reassured him that she was alright he closed his eyes and went unconcious. His last words were her name. He waited to make sure she was taken care of before he went on. That is so incredibly romantic to me and yet so fitting for their relationship. Once he was gone Nana didn't know how to go on about her everyday life. Papa Chuy still used to pump her gas so she didn't even know how to do that on her own; that may sound weird but I think that is so sweet. She still visits his grave everyday; she sits on a bench they put in years ago and she talks to him. Their love story is amazing. Everything they did, they did together. The life they built was theirs as a team that they built with each other. One of the reasons I agreed to marry Jonathan so young is because I wanted to build our life together; I didn't want to have to separate lives to join together once we were established on our own. I wanted to establish our life together, supporting each other along the way; Nana and Papa Chuy and how they lived was a big influence on me in that aspect.
Papa Chuy was loving, loyal, honest, faithful, funny, strong, supportive, an avid football fan, smart, friendly, welcoming, respectful, onry, proud yet humble, generous, grateful, caring, hard working, smitten with his wife, successful, and so much more. He was a man of God, an amazing husband, father, brother, uncle, cousin, and especially a great grandpa. He did everything he could for his family. He was sure to tell you that all of his success was a blessing from God.
I miss Papa Chuy every single day. I think about him during milestone moments and hope that his presence is somehow there. I think about him, and always will, on March 23- our birthday. I wish he was still here when I need to hear encouraging words; if I was ever feeling down he would reassure me and somehow always knew what to say. I miss sitting in his lap. I miss dancing with him; he was so suave and the best dancer (sorry Jonathan!). There are songs that will forever make me think of him. I miss his laugh. I miss seeing he & Nana bicker and then him try to chase her down for a kiss. If I ever have a son his initials will be J.A. in honor of his name, Jesus Alberto.
I am grateful for the morals he instilled in me and the influence he was and continues to be in my life. I was blessed to be his granddaughter. He taught me how to love a spouse, love your family, and how to be strong in faith. I love my Papa Chuy and I will wait for the day that I get to see him again.
Nana, Papa Chuy, & Mikey the day Mikey was born- the day of the accident.
Papa Chuy & I on our birthday...I think I was turning 3 or 4.
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